You’re probably out there cracking stupid jokes, laughing at every lame comeback, smiling at every girl who walks by, singing those happy tunes, living life, moving on. I doubt you remember anything- I doubt you remember me. Maybe you forgot about that one time you told me your deepest, darkest secret. You know, the one you never told anyone else, not even your best friend? I didn’t know why you told me, but you said it was because I was “different, there’s just something about you, Paige. I don’t know what it is, but it drives me crazy.” Then you told me you loved me, but I refused to believe you. Not because I didn’t think you did, but because I was afraid. I was frightened at the thought of you loving me one day, and loving another girl the next. But none of that matters anymore, because “friends” shouldn’t care, right? Friends shouldn’t wish the other friend still loved them. Friends shouldn’t want to be with that other person. Friends shouldn’t want to go back in time and erase every mistake, rethink every thought, change every word, and take back every memory. But I do. I, do. And it kills me, because while I’m here reminiscing about everything we once had, you’re slowly deleting me from your mind. You are perfectly fine.

• When I don’t want to be disturbed and someone tries to talk to me

• When I’m hungry and can get my hands on anything edible, or non-edible…

• When I look in the mirror

• When I want to go to the beach but every ounce of skin hangs out of my bikini

• Until that Hell Week is over

Of me you take advantage
like I’m just some kind of bandage
Only loving me for usage
to cover up those cuts and bruises
Why do you abuse me
your naivety’s amusing
But now you’re just a movie
whose ending will not move me
I should have known
I should have listened
They tried to tell me
but something in you glistened
Now your light is fading
and away from you I’ll run
No longer am I waiting
on the recovery of your sun
Who do you think you are
making me fall in love with you
and leaving all these scars
Who do you think you are
telling me you love me
then abandoning my heart
You think you have the upper-hand
you think that you’re a star
But you’re your only fan
Already forgetting who you are
I had hopes
high enough to reach the skies
Then you pushed my back against the rope
with all your pretty lies
I found strength
in the beauty of my breakdown
My pain has stretched its length
I’m turning myself around
Good luck to the girl
who will stand where I stood
This is goodbye
forever
for good